Everything I learned, I learned in a chinese restaurant
- cathiebp24
- Apr 17, 2024
- 4 min read
Updated: May 10, 2024
1980s Detroit was a volatile place to live, but above the fray stood a safe haven: Chung’s Cantonese Cuisine, where anyone—from the city’s first Black mayor to the local drag queens, from a big-time Hollywood star to elderly Jewish couples—could sit down for a warm, home-cooked meal. Here was where, beneath a bright-red awning and surrounded by his multigenerational family, filmmaker and activist Curtis Chin came of age; where he learned to embrace his identity as a gay ABC, or American-born Chinese; where he navigated the divided city’s spiraling misfortunes; and where—between helpings of almond boneless chicken, sweet-and-sour pork, and some of his own, less-savory culinary concoctions—he realized just how much he had to offer to the world, to his beloved family, and to himself.
First off, I’m a monkey too—clever and creative!!! And I prefer Coke! (pop, soda.) As to our Taurus and Cancer sign...well he's the elder. It's all about the noodles!!
“Back then, when I still thought some stereotypes could be good, I had no problem with my brother perpetuating this unicorn myth. To me, it was payback after decades of Asians being thought of as dirty and disloyal and sneaky, it was nice to hear some positive words. About us in this Country. It made up for some of the unfair past treatment.”
Ouch.
Work hard. Be quiet. Obey your elders.
Sigh. The mantra. We Asians—American–born and Immigrant–born—have been told this time and again. And thus we did what we were told, growing up to be obedient to our parents, filial piety. And for the most part we tried. I didn’t have the "joy" of experiencing the feather duster, but I’m sure it was far from pleasant.
However, for myself, it did hinder me in that I was perceived as timid. Never–the–mind I didn’t hold an accent as our Asian ancestors were lead to believe would break the stereotype through this upbringing. It's more than that. It's years (and years) of prejudice and discrimination—all through association of their (yes, their) upbringing. If not for my assessment project I had to complete as part of my final Undergraduate project and the Partners at Arthur Andersen who provided their feedback and pretty told me to get over any intimidation I was feeling, I don’t believe I would be as outspoken as I have become.
Three basic Rs–Reading, ‘riting, ‘rithmetic
“He’s Asian. He must be smart.”
The Whiz Kids! Oh to be overachievers! Back in the day and perhaps so today, yes we were looked upon as being smart, especially in math. I wasn’t especially great in math, although yes I was able to calculate the conversion rate from hard form to liquid form. (I really did love pharmacology and probably would have been a great IV infusion nurse.)
It truly makes me humble that our generation began to pull away from the traditional doctor, lawyer, engineer, nurse and expand into other professions. Although there have been actors, chefs, writers, the past few years I have been witness to the growing recognition given of Asian talents as opposed to accents, chinky eyes, and karate-sounding moves.
The model minority
To be obedient and academically gifted.
“Every minor incident—which I would later learn were called 'microaggressions' —felt like the ancient Chinese torture technique of death by a thousand cuts.”
You may thing that's over the top. (Well said btw!) I have no words—well I do. However, that’s for an in–depth discussion separate from a ranting post in my blog (and I've been forewarned of my lengthy review–yes, I know Dennis). Let's just say I've heard “go back to where you came from” comment. (one is even too much.) Er ... I was born and raised in Chicago dumbass. What really hits my nerve is the loose language to this day. Exotic? Oriental? Banana?
We’ve come a long way and still have further to go. And I'm fine with that. We are amplifying our voices, creating our own path. Let's continue to pave a wider path for future generations. Let's be the next something!
The fact that we are ALL minorities in the land of the free, one should embrace, educate, and support one's heritage (strength in numbers). So do support your local Asian communities—as an example, Chinese restaurants—and amplify our voices to end Asian Hate. Lead by example because no one else will do it for us. America is a melting pot—can't we all just get along?
Part of why I chose to add this novel to my blog is the over six decades having practically grown up in his family's Chinese restaurant, in the heart of Detroit. His insights of learning to come out as himself, to be himself. The novel's chapters are akin to a Chinese menu, and the introduction of egg foo young, one of my dad's favorite. Having written for Bon Appétit, his work has been anthologized in The Best American Food Writing 2023.
Filled with funny anecdotes, I was either laughing or rolling my eyes. So GenX of us! And you just have to be an Asian.
I enjoyed his storytelling and amplifying his voice. I was definitely engaged that made me reminisce of myself growing up. Him born and raised in Detroit proper and myself born and raised in Chicago’s West Side, no wonder we have such a warped sense of humor. But I also feel that we developed “street smarts” which most would call assimilating. Further from the truth—we all want to belong, even in America.
I do wish he shared the recipe for his grandmother's infamous almond cookie. Hi Curtis!
Adding this to my reading list! I resonate with so much of what you reflected on. Thanks for sharing this!